Tomorrow is the day when I go to the orphanage to take our 2nd son back to my apartment. It is surreal to think that this part of the journey is drawing to a close.
I have obviously been spending a lot of time with the little guy ever since I arrived here. However, my interactions with him the past two days have been very interesting. I have watched my new son express a new emotion: sadness. I have seen him quietly cry. In one sense, my heart breaks. On the other hand, it is heartwarming to see him express a new emotion.
Two days ago, I watched him go from being happy-go-lucky to suddenly sad. He started to walk back to his room and I went to pick him up. Instead of the usual laugh and smile, his little face crinkled up into sadness. I held him close and told him, "I love you. It's ok..." He rested his head on my shoulder and then his little body started to shake. He was silently crying. Sheesh. Punch me in the face. What could I do?
A similar thing happened today. I'm not sure what is going on exactly, but I know that he is mourning something. I feel like he knows that something big is going to happen. A big, life-altering, transition to a far off land without borscht, without pink leggings, and without all that he has ever known. That is hard.
This orphanage is great. It is clean, contains all of his friends, and has nannies that are sweet and caring. That cannot be easy to leave behind. I would be lamenting such a departure myself.
The good thing is that he is not running away from me, but seemingly reaching out for comfort. It is this comfort that I will provide the rest of our lives. With that said, I am realizing that this is a brave, brave boy. He has gone through a lot in his brief life. He has persevered to become a sweet and loving child despite abandonment. He has pushed Down Syndrome aside and grown physically and intellectually. This is a little boy from whom I will learn many profound truths. This is a little boy who will make me a better man. This is a little boy that God has placed in my life so that I might draw closer to my savior, Jesus Christ.
Praise be to God.
What an amazing story this all is. This little boy has no idea the love that is ahead for him:)
ReplyDeleteYou are the absolute perfect Dad For all your boys This has been planned since before the world was planned what a special time for you and Vlad! He will grow up thanking God For his very special Father.
ReplyDeleteThis is just making me cry. You are truly the perfect father for him. Amazing amazing amazing. Thank you for sharing!!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful.
ReplyDeletePraying for courage for Vlad during the coming days.
ReplyDeleteWe brought our daughter home last week. She is a little younger. I think you will find that he flourishs once you get him home. Our daughter didn't smile or laugh when we met her, now she does! And she seems to delight in the constant consistent love from the same people day in and day out, not rotating caregivers!
ReplyDeleteHang in there Josh... I cried the whole time I was "signing Timothy out" of the orphanage... it is a sad time, a scary time, and the happiest time of his life even if he doesn't know it... God bless you as you have your Gotcha Day!!! Be sure to get a photo of the two of you OUTSIDE that grey steal gate!!
ReplyDeleteAwww, poor little guy. He's gonna do great though and be so loved by Mommy and Daddy! I can't wait to hear when he's home.
ReplyDeleteWhat an allegory of all of our stories. You're a beautiful writer, Josh. Safe journey home to both of you.
ReplyDeleteOh, Josh! You have me in tears. Such a wonderful testimony. God bless you and Vlad as you move on together to reunite with momma and Sy.
ReplyDeleteI'm in tears, too! Congratulations! Sniff. Can't wait until he's home.
ReplyDeleteAmen! Vlad is one lucky boy to have a dad that loves him like you do. May God bless your family!
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